My little boy blair helped save my life

JUST like any mum, Kirsty Roberts watches her toddler son Blair playing with his favourite toys and thinks he's rather special.

But she has even more reason to think the world of her handsome little boy. For while he may be far too young to know it, 14-month-old Blair may have helped save his mummy's life.

If it hadn't been for him, Kirsty's breast cancer nightmare may not have had the same happy ending.

"Sometimes I do think that he has saved my life," smiles Kirsty as she watches Blair clamber across the floor of his South Gyle Road home. "I say to him, 'you're my medicine, it's you that is making mummy better'.

"And I often wonder if he knows that I've not been well, because he has been an absolutely wonderful laidback baby."

Today Kirsty, 34, allows herself a smile as she watches her special little boy playing at her feet. But there have been tearful times over the past 12 months when she had to face the heartbreaking possibility that she might not survive long enough to see him even start school.

Instead of enjoying those unique early months of being a first-time mum, Kirsty was thrust into a nightmare life-or-death battle against the disease every woman dreads.

She was around six months pregnant when she first noticed a small "mini egg"-shaped bump on her left breast. She thought it odd but dismissed it as one of the many changes that occur during pregnancy.

"I've been vegetarian since I was 12 years old, I don't smoke or drink and I go to the gym – so I never for a moment thought I'd be at risk at my age," she says.

"So I never gave it another thought."

It was only when Blair was ten weeks old that she happened to mention the lump to her GP.

Within a week she was at the Western General Hospital's oncology department – where she had worked in administration until the start of her maternity leave just a few months earlier.

Medical staff carried out a biopsy and Kirsty returned for the results a week later with husband Steven, 29, jiggling baby Blair on his knee.

"When they said the lump wasn't 'innocent', Steven nearly passed out and a nurse had to catch Blair to stop him falling – it was that big a shock," she remembers.

"There were so many mixed feelings. I should have been having one of the happiest times of my life with my baby, but suddenly I was wondering if I was going to be around long enough to see him grow up."

Doctors explained that while the cancerous tumour may have been sparked by hormonal changes during pregnancy, she was also incredibly lucky. "They said if it hadn't happened during pregnancy, then it could have been sparked by hormones during the menopause. And by that time I'd be much older and probably not so able to fight it off.

"So it was for the best that it happened when I was pregnant with Blair."

Kirsty endured bouts of debilitating chemotherapy before one of the country's leading cancer specialists, Mike Dixon, removed the lump in April.

Then followed radiotherapy, which left the new mum so radioactive she was banned from cuddling her baby for a day afterwards.

"That was possibly one of the hardest times," says Kirsty. "I'd be in tears thinking how unfair it was. All I wanted was to hold Blair and give him a kiss and a cuddle, but I couldn't."

It was also challenging that her role in administration at the Western General's oncology Ward One had already given her an understanding of the condition she was now fighting.

She dealt with her fears by resolving to beat her cancer, determined not to lose any precious time with her little boy.

"I decided to think positively and turn all the negatives into positives," she adds. "So when other mums complained about their children not sleeping, I'd think, 'OK, that's one thing I don't have to worry about'.

"It's also made me appreciate so much in life. I've been overwhelmed by the support I've had from family and good friends. The staff at the Western and Mr Dixon were all absolutely fantastic, and I can't praise them enough."

Kirsty is now being treated with breast cancer "wonder drug" Herceptin, before embarking on a course of Tamoxifen, which is likely to last five years.

Soon she will join Edinburgh best friends Claire Cordiner and Leona Levey – who have supported each other through their individual breast cancer battles – on the catwalk at a glitzy fashion show to raise cash for Breast Cancer Care Scotland.

Although she is now looking to the future, the cancer has meant that Blair will be her and Steven's only child.

"We spoke about freezing eggs before the treatment, but because the doctors think it may have been hormones that sparked the cancer, we decided not to do it. Besides we are so happy with Blair and have more time to focus on him."

Already she is making up for lost time. After a year in the shadow of cancer, their days are now an endless whiz of trips to toddler groups, swimming lessons and playtime.

"I try to make sure we do something every day to make up for all the time we'd lost," she explains.

"I want back that nine months we should have had together doing fun things.

"Besides," she adds, "I've learned now you can't take life for granted – anything can happen.

"I'm not going to squander a second of it."

Breast Cancer Care Scotland Fashion Show is on September 25 at Glasgow's Radisson SAS Hotel. For details and advice, call 0808 800 6000 or visit www.breastcancercare.org.uk


GENE FOUND IN 70 PER CENT OF PATIENTS
THE ovarian hormone oestrogen is thought to be linked to breast cancer. Some scientists believe it flicks on a particular gene connected to breast cancer and which is found in around 70 per cent of patients with the condition.

Studies have also found that women who develop breast cancer tend to have higher levels of oestrogen circulating in their bodies than women without breast cancer.

The hormone is produced by placenta during pregnancy and levels increase steadily until birth.

Diagnosis of cancer in pregnant women is still rare, however, oncologists believe numbers are growing as more women put off childbearing until their 30s and 40s – the age at which the risk grows.

The number of pregnancies among women with breast cancer stands at one in 3000; among women with any form of cancer at one in 1000.